Hey There!  Today we are discussing the relationship issues that occur when you are dating someone incarcerated.  
 Topic of the Week: Dating The Incarcerated (Jailed) 
Many people have never considered dating someone that is currently locked up (i.e. incarcerated, jailed, etc). However, many people do find themselves dating someone that is currently doing time behind bars. Some of the clients that I have encountered met the love of their life while visiting someone else that was talking on the phone with another inmate. Others met their love by visiting the prison with someone that was visiting another incarcerated person. At the end of the day, inmates are people too and just because they are behind bars doesn’t mean that they are no longer human or desire interaction with people on the outside. Inmates are in an alternate universe that purposefully puts them in a world that is devoid of sensory stimuli. That void creates a need. Some inmates harness their energy and do their time quietly and alone. While others crave attention from someone that cares about them or that can provide insight into the outside world. 

Enter the new relationship…

The phone is their lifeline to the outside world. During the phone sessions, both parties tend to be captive audiences. The need for attention, time, mental stimulation, and even sexual stimulation is satiated with phone conversations. The inmate wants to constantly talk to his or her new friend and the new friend tends to enjoy all the undivided attention. They often make plans for when the inmate is released and can’t wait to start their new life together. 

Then the inmate is released…

At first, the couple is happy to be together in the flesh without bars separating them. They blissfully explore each other in the real world and learn about each other each day. Then reality steps in. The inmate is not accustomed to so much freedom. At this point, they will either stay sequestered in the house for fear of venturing out into the big, loud, and fast-moving world out there or they will party and act as if they were the younger version of themselves. Either way, trouble starts to brew……

Check out my Youtube video linked below to find out more about what happens when the blinders are taken off and reality sets in after the incarcerated person is released from prison!

Also, stay tuned for more of my relationship series: 

Types of Dysfunctional Relationships:

  • Codependency: Oh my! I decided to jump in with one of the MOST common and destructive relationships out there! So many people are in Codependent Relationships and don’t even realize it! If your “helping” another person has started to drain you of your money, time, energy, etc. then this topic is for you!  (Completed)
  • Emotional Affairs: This occurs when that “work boo” or “work husband/wife” gets a littttleee toooo close! (Completed)
  • Infidelity/Cheating: We will discuss why infidelity often occurs and what you can do about it. (Completed)
  • Dating An Inmate: This occurs more than you think! We will discuss how to prepare and handle this situation. 
  • Domestic Violence in Relationships: This is one of the MOST dangerous relationships!
  • The Cheatsheet: Who Are You REALLY dating? You will learn about the Four Archetypes found in men that you have probably dated in the past!
  • Long Distance Relationships: Is it worth it or not? 
  • Narcissistic Relationships: This is my newest content! A new Youtube video is coming to complement this topic!
To learn about more the various types of dysfunctional relationships, be sure to SUBSCRIBE to my Youtube channel, Therapist In Your Head!

Let’s Stay in Touch! 


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(Learn With Deirdre Channel)- http://bit.ly/learnwithdeirdrechannel

(All Things Deirdre Channel)- http://bit.ly/allthingsdeirdrechannel

Deirdre Haynes Counseling Services:

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Mailing Address:

Deirdre Haynes

P. O. Box 290902

Columbia, SC 29229

The Blindspot Biz

The Blindspot Biz

Hello there! I am Deirdre Haynes and I am the owner of Deirdre Haynes Counseling Services and The Blindspot Biz. I am a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), a Licensed Professional Counselor Supervisor (LPCS), a Nationally Board Certified Teacher (NBCT) in School Counseling, and a Nationally Certified Counselor (NCC). I have over seventeen years of experience in the counseling field. I am a licensed mental health therapist, certified Hypnotherapist, author of 18 books, and a blogger/vlogger (Youtube). My full intention is to help you discover your blindspots (or those unknown obstacles that impede progress), change your mindset and patterns of thinking, and TRANSFORM your life! *Hope * Heal * Help

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